Deletes Scenes (A Father's Day Message)
Deleted Scenes
(Eph 3:14-19; 6:4)
14 For this reason I bow my knees before
the Father, 15 from whom every family in heaven and on earth takes its name. 16
I pray that, according to the riches of his glory, he may grant that you may be
strengthened in your inner being with power through his Spirit, 17 and that
Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith, as you are being rooted and
grounded in love. 18 I pray that you may have the power to comprehend, with all
the saints, what is the breadth and length and height and depth, 19 and to know
the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, so that you may be filled with all
the fullness of God.
4 Fathers, do not provoke your children
to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
In the year 2000, the film Gladiator won the Academy Award for
best picture. The screenplay basically came from two previous Hollywood films, 1960’s
Spartacus and 1964’s Fall of the Roman Empire. Both of these
early 60s era films had significant Christian content, as was popular in
post-war America. When you get a copy of a film on disc there are sometimes
deleted scenes that were originally shot for the film, but were cut out of the
theatrical release. What’s interesting is
to look at the deleted scenes in Gladiator.
All content having to do with Christians in the film were cut out of the
theatrical release.
The US Census reveals that 43% of US
children live without their father. In our ZIP code over 50% of children are
growing up fatherless. Some in our society are quite comfortable with the
absence of fathers in the home. It’s OK
to delete the father from the scene. They aren’t necessary, they say, for
children to grow healthy lives. Recent
studies about the impact on fatherless children say otherwise.
- 63% of youth suicides are from
fatherless homes (US Dept. Of Health/Census) – 5x Avg.
- 90% of all homeless and runaway
children are from fatherless (32x
Avg)
- 85% of all children who show
behavior disorders come from fatherless homes – 20x Avg. (Center for
Disease Control)
- 80% of rapists with anger problems
come from fatherless homes –14x Avg.
(Justice & Behavior, Vol 14, p. 403-26)
- 71% of all high school dropouts
come from fatherless homes – 9x Avg. (National
Principals Association Report)
- 85% of all youths in prison come
from fatherless homes – 20x Avg.
(Fulton Co. Georgia, Texas Dept. of Correction)
- Daughters of single parents without
a Father involved are 53% more likely to marry as teenagers, 711% more
likely to have children as teenagers, 164% more likely to have a
pre-marital birth and 92% more likely to get divorced themselves.
Traditionally speaking,
the ideal family has a both parents in the home who provide and protect and
nurture their family. But we don’t always get an ideal childhood. Post-war America saw many men return home and
start families. It was the baby
boom. Surviving the violence of war some
fathers coped through alcohol, emotional distance, and reacted with domestic
violence. Their children, the Baby Boomers, responded in defiance, rejecting
the life handed to them. The generation gap was a war of its own. In 1970 Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young
released Teach Your Children, a
commentary on those tumultuous times in our country.
Teach your children well
their father’s hell did slowly go by
And feed them on your dreams
the one they picks
The one you’ll know by
And you, of tender years,
Can't know the fears that your elders
grew by,
And so please help them with your youth,
They seek the truth before they can die.
Teach your parents well
the children’s hell will slowly go by
Don’t you ever ask them why
If they told you, you would cry
So just look at them and sigh, and know
they love you.
It was a song that called for healing
and understanding in the home, as well as a proclamation of independence from
it. In the face of generational conflict
just accept it, the song says, and understand that you really do love one
another.
I don’t want to spend any more time
talking about the epidemic of fatherless America and the sad history that led
us to this place. Perhaps a word from the scriptures might shed some light on
the way out of this mess. Of course the answer is found in our knowledge of God
through Jesus Christ.
What is key to fatherhood is the
presence.
1)
Your daily presence in the lives of your children
2)
The presence of the Holy Spirit in your life.
Paul started a church in Ephesus with
about 12 followers Jesus. That had never
heard of the Holy Spirit. That had only been baptized for repentance according
to the custom of John the Baptist. So
Paul told them John’s baptism was meant to prepare them for fellowship with
Jesus. Paul baptized them in the name of Jesus and laid hands on them and they
each received the Holy Spirit.
In our reading in John’s gospel we heard
Jesus teach about the Holy Spirit. He told His disciples that Holy Spirit will
take what knowledge of God the Father, which Jesus shares, and guide the church
into all truth. Fathers, seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit as you read your
Bibles, pray and listen to your wives and children. The Spirit will grant you wisdom and insight.
Paul opens his letter to the Ephesians
by celebrating how God has blessed the church with every spiritual blessing in
the heavenly realm. We enjoy these blessings through the Spirit. God has
lavishly showered these spiritual gifts upon us His adopted children.
Adopted children are special, because
their adoptive parents chose them. God chose to be your Father though Jesus
Christ. In fact, Paul writes that every
family, whether in heaven or on earth, takes their name from God, which I
interpret to mean our identity as family comes from God.
God is three persons in one, Father,
Son, and Holy Spirit, so intimately connected that the three are one in perfect
unity. The trinity is our example for
family relationships. We are to be united in love, such that we are one.
Some of God’s children came to live in
obedience to their heavenly Father, but others, like the prodigal son, wandered
far from home. Does that stop God from loving His children? Never! God waits
patiently for His children to come to their senses and recognize that there’s
more than enough to satisfy them in their Father’s house.
Fathers, be more like the father in the
story of the Prodigal Son. Always love, always pray, and wait with hope and
patience for your child to come to maturity in Christ. How you behave daily with your children does
more to teach them about God than anything else.
Being a father is hard work at times.
Our children can try our patience. So look to the Lord for patience. Too often our
identity is tied to our work and not from our relationship with God. When
things are unsatisfying at work, we can become frustrated and moody. It’s at those times, fathers, that we need to
be reminded where our true worth is found.
Paul prays for the church that we might
be strengthened within through the Holy Spirit, that God would give us power,
through the Spirit, to comprehend the immensity of God’s love for us. God’s love surpasses knowledge, which is a way
of saying it’s mind-blowing! Through the presence of the Holy Spirit in our
lives, we will be rooted and grounded in love as Christ dwells in our hearts
through faith.
I love that word rooted. It reminds me
of the trees planted by streams of water, (Psalm 1:3)
which yield their fruit in its season,
and their leaves do not wither.
In all that they do, they prosper.
When your life is rooted and grounded in
the knowledge of God’s love for you, chosen in Jesus Christ as His own child,
you will never want for anything. For in
the knowledge of the Lord, your shepherd, you find you have everything you
need. You will have times of trouble in this life. But have courage in the face
of difficulties, for Christ is with you. He has overcome the world and its
brokenness. With Him, so will you.
Fathers, be men of faith, who know the
love of God and grow in the love of God and bear fruit that lasts of the glory
of God. Teach your children to trust in the name of the Lord and show them
God’s love in all you do.
Jenn Scott, of Virginia, was left with
$70,000 of debt racked up during her ex-husband’s bi-polar episodes. Her son Aden wouldn’t hear from his father 6
months at a time. Aden cried himself to
sleep many nights wondering why his father didn’t want him. He wondered what he
had to do to get his father back. Eventually his father moved away to South
America and told Aden he’d never see him again. Aden would break down in tears and screaming
fits at school when he saw other children with their fathers, or when his
half-sister spoke of giving a Father’s Day gift to her father. During these times when Jenn asked Aden what
was wrong, he’d simply say, “I just want my dad.” Aden grew sullen, isolated
and angry. He struggled in school. Even Boy Scouts caused him pain because he
saw other boys with fathers. His father had been deleted from his life.
Jenn found a solution. A local church
was part of a ministry known as Fathers in the Field. The ministry empowers men
to be a loving presence in the life of a fatherless child. Aden met his mentor
father, John, and the two hit it off. They go out canoeing together. Since his involvement in Fathers
in the Field, Aden now prays and thanks God for the men in his life. He
prays for his dad, that he finds God, and that he is happy. It’s a rare
occasion anymore that he’s visibly or verbally upset about his dad. Jenn thanks
God for the men of Fathers in the Field. Their willingness to be there for Aden
has turned his life around.
This is just one way the church can meet
the needs created by fatherless America. This church used to host a Boy Scout
troop, and a youth ministry. Perhaps at some point in the future the Lord would
move hearts to begin a ministry that meets the needs of fatherless children,
since over 50% of our neighbors children live in fatherless homes.
In Psalms 68:5, God is called the Father
of the fatherless. For those of you who are searching for something to fill
your life, perhaps it’s out of an emptiness that came from a fatherless home,
know that Your Father in heaven has never abandoned you. You may have felt that
way, perhaps even blamed God. But God waits for you to come home, watching for
your arrival with arms wide open.
May God guide us all to be ready to
share faith, hope and love with all of God’s children wherever they may be
found.
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